In my bed I’m lost in my head. I’m feel empty yet I’m consume in this constant pain. I’ll play, smile and even sing with you but the pain continues to lurk within consuming my soul. My pain nobody sees as it is overtaking me and travelling through every pore of my heart.
I can’t remember how it all started and I don’t know when it would end. Maybe this was an heirloom passed to me by my father, for he once told me “my love depression comes and nothing”. If I could make a wish it would be for it all to end.
I was told medically, take this and it would be fine but what they fail to see is that no two cases are the same, for depression is a state in the mind which affects my body’s core. It makes me sleep more than usual or hardly sleep at all, there’s no middle ground. I start to ignore the way I look and stop loving the things that I once loved. I’ve become a corpse walking among the living with beautiful smiles that hides my trimmings. If I could make a wish it would be for it all to end.
I was told happiness would find you but instead depression did, fighting me with psychological blows while suffocating me. For what I feel is not sadness but the absence of feeling and a nonstop throbbing pain in my mental sphere. I’m not sure if there is sense within these words. If a scream could explain how I feel I would broke thousands of mirrors or make a storm with my tears. For these feelings are like swimming against the tides but I can’t so I shut my mouth to cover my silent clamour and wish for it all to end.