Discovering myself everyday is a journey that has proven to be challenging but also humbly.
I’m drowning in my own self, I’m suffocating mentally, so I need to pen my thoughts down as a form of escape. A way to get my pestering thoughts out.
Without writing I am numb, ugly and in pain, walking zombie like, towards emptiness. All my emotions would have been blocked by the need to hold myself together and that I have tried so hard. To be a girl who laughs just cause she can, and sees the best in people but I’m not her anymore. I am just someone, who feels way too much at once,I cry at night when I’m all alone, dancing with my demons on my own,
So I write to be free, to be me.
To be able to scream with my words, to be able to be free of my pains and keep my sanity. To show that the outside is decent but the inside is a mess. I’d rather feel physically ill, than to be mentally unwell, and let my demons spin out of control. Please don’t make me stop, for writing to me is not only a way to express myself, for It’s so hard to be in my own head,
Every day it’s like a piece of me fades away, and this is the only way I know how to fight it. My very own insanity prevention plan.